Have you ever experienced pain that was too deep for words? Like there’s a storm raging in your soul and all your heart can do is try to shield itself from the shrapnel of hurts and lies?
I found myself in a situation like that the other day. Satan’s lies had been sawing on the wall of my heart for days, until finally it split open and my hurt and brokenness poured out.
I was a mess. I struggled violently through tears to find a way through the pain. I tried to repress the weariness of my heart; tried to be better; tried to be something other than the fragile human being that I was.
As I fought and strove in vain; my prayers tumbling out my mouth in a tangled mass–attempting to express my hurt and failing miserably, I sensed my Heavenly Father draw near.
I felt Him lean close and whisper softly in my ear, “I know… I know your pain. I know your hurt. I know your fragile human heart; I made it. You don’t need to express; you don’t need to figure it out or find the answer to the problem. Right here, right now, all you need to do is sit with Me in the silence and rest in the knowledge that I am here, I love you, and I know…”
I cannot express with mere words the magnitude of freedom and relief that filled my soul in that moment. I can’t tell you what a relief it was to not have to figure it all out for once; to simply accept God’s tender invitation and allow my human heart to find rest in the sovereign care of His unwavering compassion.
Romans 8:26 tells us, “In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know how we ought to pray, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans too deep for words” (BSB).
When I find myself in that place, where the pain is beyond my attempts to describe; where my heart is being torn in two and I want to talk to God, but I’m too exhausted to explain it, and I wouldn’t know where to begin if I tried—in that moment His Spirit speaks for me.
He knows everything. He knows my heart. He knows my pain; and when I’m too drained from sorrow to utter the words, He sits with me in the silence…and He knows.
In those times when my emotions are in knots and there is no resolution in sight, it is a relief to know that God sees me in my weakness, and He loves, and He stays, and He knows ❤